Būt vai nebūt /// To be or not to be

Mamma nekad nestāsta anekdotes un jokus, viņa reizēm var mazliet pasmaidīt, kad citi stāsta, bet pati viņa nekad. Parasti mamma vienkārši saka lietas, kuras ir smieklīgas, par kurām var jauki paķiķināt. Šovakar viņa bija atbraukusi no igaunijas dabas takām, un viņa mums ar Lāsmu stāstīja anekdoti par igauņiem. Bija tiešām smieklīgi, man patika.

Bija igauņu operdziedātājs, kurš dziedāja slaveno igauņu operu "Hamlets", acīmredzot bija titullomā. Igaunijā viņam labi veicās, viņš visiem patika, un operdziedātājs nolēma, ka jāpaplašina apvāršņi un jātaisa karjera ārzemēs. Dziedonis atbrauca uz Rīgu, dziedāja "Hamletu" latviski, taču viņa Latvijas karjera beidzās brīdī, kad "būt vai nebūt vietā" viņš dziedāja "pūt vai nepūt". Izslavētās igauņu problēmas ar balsīgajiem līdzskaņiem laikam savu slavu godam pelnījušas.

Aizbrauca meklēt karjeras spožo saulīti uz citu kaimiņzemi, Krieviju. Dziedāja krieviski, tikai "быть или не быть" diemžēl izklausījās pēc "пить или не пить" [krievu val. - dzert vai nedzert], un smieklīgi traģēdijā nav labi, tāpēc arī Krievijas zvaignīte nokrita.

Beigās uz Angliju aizbrauca "Hamletu" dziedāt, bet viņš bija igaunis, un visiem, izņemot igauņus, ir tieksme esamības izteiksmi pārpludināt ar "b" burtiem, un "to be or not to be" diemžēl, diemžēl klausītāju ausīs ieplūda kā "to pee or not to pee" [angļu val. - čurāt vai nečurāt]. Anglijā arī nekas nesanāca, tad igauņu operdziedātājs brauca atpakaļ uz Igauniju, dziedāja, un tur viņam gāja ļoti labi un viss sanāca, un neviens neiedomājās, ka viņš neprot lietot b burtus.

Tad mēs parunājām par to, ka Losandželosa ir Eņģeļi, un ka, lai cik apburošs tāds vārds pilsētai nebūtu, tas tomēr skan pēc Latvijas lauku miesta. Es te uz Eņģeļiem pēc zivtiņām aizbraukšu. Stopiņu pagastā, Eņģeļos, dzīves 77. gadskārtu svin Jēkabs Apšuciems.

Tajā pašā brīdī iztēlojos apmēram 30gadīgas sievietes siluetu gaiši pelēkā sporta tērpā, tajā mīkstajā, kas reizēm tiek lietoti kā mājas tērpi; viņai mati bija astē un gaiši brūni, un mana uzmanība bija vērsta uz jakas līnijām. Līnijas, es domāju, zeltainas līnijas iet gar jaku. It kā vakara gaisma, it kā gaisma no muguras (to sauc par kontru, kādu laiciņu es to zinu).


^^^^^

Mum never telles any jokes, she might smile a bit when someone else tells them, still she never tells jokes herself. Usuallly mum just tells funny things, that we can nicely laugh about. We do like to make fun of certain things she tells. Tonight she had arrived from Estonia, where she was walking some nature paths, and she told me and Lasma a joke about Estonians, it was a funny one, I liked it.

There was an Estonian opera singer, whose top number was the famous Estonian opera Hamlet", he obviously was in the title-role. He had success in Estonia, everyone liked him, and he decided to widen his horizons and make career abroad. The singer went to Riga, his neighbour country Latvia, he song "Hamlet" in Latvian, though his career in Latvia ended at the moment when he sang "pūt vai nepūt" ["pūt vai nepūt - from latvian ''blow or don't blow", or "to rot or not to rot", when it was supposed to be "būt vai nebūt" - in Latvian "to be or not to be"]. The well-known Estonian inability to pronounce voiced consonants seems to be fairly well grounded.

He went to look for his career's shining moments to another neighbour land, Russia. He sang in Russian, however unfortunately the well meant words "быть или не быть " ["to be or not to be" - in Russian] sounded a lot like "пить или не пить" ["to drink or not to drink" - in Russian], and funny is no good in tragedies, so his Russian star fell as well.

In the end he left for singing "Hamlet" in England. But he was Estonian, and everyone except Estonians have the urge to fill the word which expresses existence with letter "b". Unluckily for him, what the singer uttered as "to be or not to be" reached the audience's ears as "to pee or not to pee". As he neither succeed in Russian, Latvia, nor did he in England, he had nothing left to do but return to Estonia. And he had great success there, and not even one thought could cross anyone's mind that the singer might be unable to pronounce "b".

Then we discussed a bit that fact that Los Angelos is angels and, no matter how charming such name could be for a city, the name still resembles a town in Latvian countryside. I'll take a quick drive to Angels [Eņģeļi  - Latvian] to pick up some fishes.

At the same moment I imagined the silhouette of 30 years old woman wearing light grey loungewear, you know, the soft one which one uses as homewear; her hair was in ponytail and lightly brown, and I concentrated on the lines of the jersey.  The lines, I thought, golden lines go along the jersey. Somewhat evening light, somewhat lightning from the back (it's called contra light, I know it for some time now).

Mēs esam dvīņi, un mēs izskatāmies līdzīgi /// We are twins and we resemble each other

Vakar filmēšanas laukumā ieradās apmēram deviņus gadus vecs dvīņu pāris. Viņiem bija jāspēlē dvīņu brāļi, kuri kopā ar mammu dodas ar vilcienu uz pludmali. Sagrimēju vienu dvīni, un gribēju grimēt otru, bet otrais bija izvairīgāks. Viņš pakāpās nostāk un teica, ka nevēlas grimēties. Producents mēģināja viņu pierunāt un stāstīja, ka visi aktieri grimējas, lai kadrā nespīdētu, bet viņu tas nepārliecināja. Izvairīgajam dvīnim jautāja, vai viņam negribas, ka viņam liek uz sejas kaut ko, viņš īsti neatbildēja. Viņam jautāja, vai viņš kautrējas, un Eduards atbildēja, ka, jā, viņš kautrējoties.

Dvīņu mammu bija paredzēts spēlēt Diānai, kurai pašai ir līdzīgo dvīņu puiku pāris. Kad Diāna viņiem jautājot, nu vai viņiem patīk, ka viņi ir līdzīgi, viņi sakot, ka, jā, patīkot. Bet tas droši vien tikai tāpēc, ka mamma jautājot. Sagrimējusies Diāna piegāja dvīņu mammai apjautāties, kā iet ar dvīņu audzināšanu, un Eduarda un Paula mamma atbildēja, ka šis jau tāds mierīgs periods.

Dvīņu zēniem bija līdzi mazītiņš brālis Marts, kuram tika iedalīta meitenītes Annas brālīša loma, un Marts lomas sagatavošanas darbiem piegāja nopietni. Tūlīt pat viņš devās pie Annas iepazīties un gaidot bezmaz vai visu dzīvi izstāstīja, lēkājot no vienas tēmas pie otras, no vecmāmiņas šūpolēm pārceļoties uz gastronomiskām pieredzēm.

Eduardam un Paulam savs kadrs bija kādu laiku jāpagaida - piecu desmitgadnieku grūstīšanās uz perona  filmēšana neveicās pārmēru veikli. Kamēr viens dvīnis nāca paziņot, ka, cerams, drīz filmēšot viņus, jo viņiem ir apnicis gaidīt, otrs garšļaukus gulēja uz perona.
Galu gala pienāca arī Paula un Eduarda kārta, bet kadrēšanās nebija gluda kā zīda diedziņš, jo Eduards kautrējās un nevēlējās dot roku Diānai. Dvīņu mammu beigās pierunāja iefilmēties, viņai un Diānai piešķīra vēl vienu bērnu - miesīgo brāli Martu, kurš bija priecīgā mierā ar visu, kas notiek - un ūdens pudeli; dvīņiem iešķieba bumbu, lai nav jāturas pie rokas. Eduards un Pauls līksmi attālinājās no ūdens pudeļu, mammu un mazo brāļu pulciņa, lai uzspēlētu bumbu. Kad režisore teica, lai Pauls nāk tuvāk, jo viņš ir ārpus kadra, Pauls braši un mērķtiecīgi kāpās atpakaļ. Jo vairāk balstiņas kliedza: "Nāc šurpu!", jo tālāk Pauls smaidīgi kāpās. Eduards ieteicās, ka viņam vajag otrādi visu teikt, un pats teica Paulam: "Ej prom!" Man nekad nebija licies, ka apgrieztā psiholoģija var darboties tik tieši, bet, skatoties, kā Pauls tuvojās Eduardam, šķita, ka tieši to tā psihologija darīja. Tā kā es atrados tuvāk zēniem, tālāk no pārējiem, teicu Paulam, lai viņš iet tālāk, cerībā, ka mūsu divas balstiņas būs pietiekamas, un Pauls, priecīgi smaidīdams, čāpoja tuvāk.

Bildes ir no Līgas Spundes dvīņu projekta. Viņa sacerēja dziesmu, uzfilmēja video un pat fotosesiju, kurā mēs visu savu līdzību kā uz delnas izliekam, uztaisīja. "Dvīņu dziesmā" ir tā, ka īstenībā mēs abas tur dziedam, bet video izskatās tā, ka Lāsma divās balsīs dzied un vēl flautu iesvilpo.

^^^^^

Yesterday on the set was a couple of 9 year old twin brothers. They had to play twin brothers who were headed to the beach in the company of their mum. I did make-up for one twin and was about to start with another one, still the last one was more elusive. He stepped aside and said, he didn't want any make-up. The producer tried to convince him, he was explaining that all actors wear make-up so that they didn't shine in the shot, but it wasn't enough. The elusive twin was asked whether he didn't want to have anything on his face, but he didn't reply clearly. Then he was asked, did he feel shy, and Eduard replied that, yes, he was shy.

Diana was supposed to take the role of twin brothers' mum, and she happens to own a pair of identical twin brothers of her own. Whenever Diana asks them: "Do you like to resemble each other?", they always say: "Yes, we do like it." Still she finds it's because it is their mum who's asking. Afterwards her make-up was done, Diana went to twins' mum to ask, how is it going with raising twins. The mum of Eduards and Pauls said it was quite okay right then, this was kind of peaceful period of time.
Twin brothers' little brother Marts came together with them. On the spot he received the role of the little brother of Anna, and he took the preparation for the role seriously indeed. Right away Marts introduced himself to Anna and told almost the whole story of his life, jumping from one theme to another, from grannies' swings moving onto gastronomic experiences.

Eduards and Pauls had to wait for a while - jostling of five 10 years old boys was not the quickest thing to shoot. While one twin came forward to announce that they hoped that they would be filmed soon, since they were notably bored, the other twin was lying at full length on platform.
Finally it was time for Eduards and Pauls to shoot, yet the framing did not pass as smoothly as a silky thread. Eduards said, he felt shy, and he did not want to give his hand to Diana. At last twins' mum was convinced to play the mum; she and  Diana received an additional kid - the kindred brother Marts, who was cheerful about everything that was happening and didn't mind a thing - and a bottle of water. The twin brothers got a ball, which cancelled the need to give hand to hold. Eduards and Pauls merrily went further and further away from the tiny crowd of water bottles, mums and little brother's to play the ball. When the director told Pauls to come closer, as he was completely out of the shot, Pauls purposefully and decisively stepped back. Eduards uttered that Pauls had to be told the other way round and said himself: "Go away!" I never thought the reverse psychology could work this directly, but seeing Pauls approaching Eduards, seemed that this was exactly what that psychology was doing. As I was closer to boys, further from others, I told Pauls to move further away, hoping that our two tiny voices would be enough, and Pauls, quite happily started to pace in our direction.

Pictures make part of Liga Spunde's twins project. She composed a song, made music video and even did photo shoot, where we displayed all the twin resemblance we have got. In "Twin song" actually both of us sing, although in music video it looks like Lasma sings in two voices and whistles in flute tones when she's free from singing.

Lāsma, Elīna

Biezoknim koncertiņš, jē jupī!

Reiz Biezoknis (viena no manām mīļākajām grupām, laikam) ierakstīja dziesmu un dziesmai arī video klipu uzfilmēja. Tas bija patiesi sen, novembrī, man šķiet, bet tik un tā skaitās. Un rīt viņi, tavu brīnumu, spēlē sešas dziesmas tādā kā festivāliņā vai kā tamlīdzīgi, katrā ziņā, tas ir šodien, 26. jūlijā, 19.30 Audēju ielā 6 vietā, kas saucas "Omas briljanta istaba". Man tiešām liekas, ka ir vērts iet lūkot un kuplināt Biezokņa fanu pūļus. (Es pārspīlēju, viņiem vēl nav gluži fanu pūļi, taču attiecībā pret viņu līdzšinējās darbības aktivitāti, fanu vervēšana sokas ļoti produktīvi). Pirms pāris dienām grupai pievienojās jauns mūzikas instruments - rotaļlietu veikalā pirkts metalafons ar pustoņiem ar vālītēm, netrūka nevienas metāla plāksnītes, un tas ievērojami uzlabojot grupas skanējumu.

Būs arī "Dvīņu dziesma".

^^^^^
Once "Biezoknis" (one of my favorite bands, I suppose) recorded a song and made music video for it. It has been a long time since November, when it all happened, but I guess it still matters. And tomorrow, what a surprise, they are gonna perform six songs in a small festival or something, anyways, it's today, July 26 at 19.30 on Audeju iela 6. The place is called "Omas briljanta istaba" / "Grandma's brilliant room".
I really do find it worth to check on them and to join their fan crowds. (I exaggerate, they don't have crowds of fans yet. Yet considering the level of their recent activity, the recruitment of fans has been quite productive so far.) Few a days ago a new instrument joined the band - glockenspiel bought in toy store. No metal plate is missing, it does have both of the sticks, and it should improve the sounding of the band.
"Twin song" will also be there.

Dziesma un video ir Līgas - grupas taustiņinstrumentālistes - garabērns. Aizgrābjoši, manuprāt. Tēma man arī ļoti patīk, tāda tuva.

Uz skatuves - Biezoknis:

ukulele, vokāli un svilpošana flautas skaņās - Lāsma 

taustiņinstrumenti, mūzika un teksts - Līga

bass un vokāls - Rolands

sitaminstrumentu grupa - Klāvs

kamera - Māra

The song and video is the artistic offspring of Liga - band's keyboardist. Thrilling, I'd say. The theme is also touching.
On the stage - Biezoknis:
ukulele, vocals and whistling in the tunes of flute - Lasma
keyboard, music and text - Liga
bass and vocals - Rolands
drums - Klavs
camera - Mara

Rolands

Līga

Lāsma 

Klāvs

Klāvam besī pāremocionāli bundzinieki, viņu var saprast /// Klavs cannot stand overemotional drummers, I do get his point

Visi, kuri zina Hondurasu /// All those who know Honduras

- ko nu skaties pulkstenī, lesiju vairs nerāda.
- tas tavs dabiskais nejaukums!

mamma manu pārmetumu lāsmai uztvēra nedaudz personiski, jo tēvs taču nav nejauks, un no kurienes gan lāsmai tad ir tas iedzimtais nejaukums, ja ne no viņas. acīmredzot reizēm jāievēro piesardzības pasākumi, apsaukājot miesīgu māsu.

tad es iedomājos vienu ļoti labu vārdu, un gribēju, lai mēs paspēlējam vārdu spēli, jo būtu grēks tik labu vārdu laist zudībā. lāsma teica, ka viņai jau tās vārdu spēles labi sanāk, un, jāatzīst, viņa ir visai rūdīta spēlmane ar stāžu. to pāris mēnešu laikā, kamēr viņa stopēja pa eiropu, viņa diezgan labi satrenējās, jo, kad visi sarunu temati apsīka, bija jāķeras pie vārdu spēles.

tas bija patiešām labs vārds, un es gandrīz visu laiku teicu 'nē' vai arī 'nu, pārāk jau nav'. lāsma nolēma, ka vispirms jāuzmin cilvēku grupa, kam tā lieta tuva - galu galā tieši tā viņa reiz atminēja klāva vārdu 'grēks'. kad noskaidrojās, ka kristiešiem tā lieta ir, bet citiem nav sevišķi aktuāla, uzreiz dzīve atvieglojās.

ģeogrāfi tomēr bija izmanīgāki par kristiešiem un tik viegli rokās nedevās, un beigās lāsma azimutu neatminēja. tiešam labs vārds. varbūt mazliet pārāk labs, jo es pavidam arī ieguglēju definīciju, lai varētu teikt pārliecinošākus 'nē'.

lāsmai gan tas nešķita labs vārds, viņasprāt, azimuts ir reāli muļķīgs vārds, ko iedomāties, neviens taču tādu nezina. viņai jau vispār nepatīk, ja es izvēlos kādu ģeogrāfijas vārdu. vienreiz, kad es pašsaprotamā kārtā izvēlējos vārdu 'hondurasa', viņai vajadzēja brītiņu laika, lai pieņemtu domu, ka tāda valsts patiesi eksistē.

- manuprāt, visi, kuri zina hondurasu, ir ģeogrāfijas zubri.


^^^^^

- why do you look at the clock, they don't show Lassie anymore anyways.
- that innate dis-niceness of yours!

mum took my reproach to lasma sort of personally. since dad isn't 'not nice', where does this dis-niceness of lasma come from if not from her. i obviously have to take into account some precautionary measures before calling my kindred sibling names.

then a really good word popped into my mind, and i wanted to play word game, so that the great word gets full use of its greatness. it would have been such a pity to waste such a peach of a word. lasma told us she was pretty good at word game, and i have to admit, she really is a decent player with impressive experience. she got quite good at the word game during the hitch-hiking months in europe, when they had to turn to the old, good word game at the moment they ran out of conversation subjects.

it really was such a good word. i nearly always had to answer with "no" or "well, not really". (the rules of game in short - one person imagines no matter what word, and the other one tries to guess it by asking polar questions.) at first lasma decided to start with guessing the group of people whom this word might concern. after all that was the technique which enabled her to guess klavs' word "sin". when she realized that christians own this thing while others are not really concerned about it, the life got easier at the very same moment.

yet geographers were more cunning than christians and did not give in that easily, and in the end lasma hadn't guessed "azimuth". such a great word. it might be even a wee bit too great, since even i had to google a bit the definition of azimuth during the game to enable myself telling sounder "no's".

lasma didn't find it so amazing. according to her, "azimuth" was a pretty silly word to choose, no one is aware of its existence! she doesn't appreciate me picking geography words at all actually. once when i self-evidently picked "honduras , she needed some time to recover and accept that there was such a state in the world for real.

- i think that everyone who knows honduras, is a geo geek.

ģeorāfijas zubris (un Gints) /// geo geek (and Gints)

zina, kas ir Hondurasa un ka azimuts atrodams ģeogrāfijā /// knows what Honduras is and that azimuth can be found in geography

ģeogrāfijas nūģis (un Likijs) /// geo  noob (and Likijs)

domā, ka Hondurasa ir kaut kāds sabraficēts izdomājums, un regulāri jauc Helsinkus ar Oslo /// thinks that Honduras is a made-up concept and consistently mixes up Helsinki with Oslo

Mana dārgā ģimene /// My sweet family

Es: "Kopš atbraukšanas no Skotijas man mati kļuvuši taisnāki."
Mamma: "Nu re, aizbrauci uz Skotiju - kļuvi par aitu."
Es: "?!!"
Lāsma: "Bet aitiņa taču ir jauks zvēriņs. Tāpat kā govis un kaziņas. Un galu galā arī zābaki un cirvji ir noderīgi priekšmeti."



Lāsma: Es pieskaros eļļas burciņai! [Tovakar es biju diezgan verbāli eksplicīta attiecībā uz lietām, kuras tobrīd darīju.]
Es: Ak, nu kāpēc tu esi tik nejauka, es nesaprotu!
Mamma: Gandrīz jau bakalaurs, un vēl nesaprot!
Es: :((((
Lāsma: Piedod, es nevarēju atturēties.



^^^^^
Me: "My hair has become straighter since I got back from Scotland."
Mum: "You see - went to Scotland and become a sheep."
Me: "?!!"
Lasma: "But sheep is such a nice animal. As well as cows and goats. And after all, a mug can be quite handy sometimes.


Lasma: I'm touching the oil jar!  [I was being pretty verbally explicit in what I was doing that evening.]
Me: Ah, why are you so harsh, I don't understand!
Mum: Almost graduated, and yet doesn't understand!
Me:  :(((((((
Lasma: Sorry, I couldn't resist.